


Punchdrunk

by setaxis



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Arrow AU, Dark Robin Hood, Homophobia, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Swearing, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-29
Updated: 2015-05-23
Packaged: 2018-03-31 21:08:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 12,677
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3992920
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/setaxis/pseuds/setaxis
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Yixing has never really been a believer in ‘fairness’ – not unless you make it yourself. So that’s just what he’s doing. One fat, rich pig at a time. Then he finds a man beaten and left at the side of the road: a man who he brings into his home and eventually, his heart.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the [onlayforlu](http://onlayforlu.livejournal.com/) exchange. I'm not incredibly happy with this, but if I tried to fix it it would go from 13k to 1000k so yeah...

 

 

The rain is beating down on his shoulders. It's raining so hard it feels heavy, like there's something pushing down on him. It's not a feeling he especially likes. Shivering, he pulls his sodden jacket tighter around himself in a vain attempt to keep put the chill and walks a little faster through the gloom. Unsurprisingly there's nobody else out on the streets. The effect is surprisingly eerie - there's no sound but the drumming of the rain and the squelching of his own footsteps.

 

Then a gentle moan pierces the silence. At first Yixing thinks his ears are playing tricks on him but then it comes again, stronger this time. He edges forward towards the source of the noise.

 

There, lying on the pavement backed up against the wall of the house, is a body. The shock of bright blond hair that stands out starkly against the rain-darkened pavement is the only reason Yixing would have seen him there at all - the guy's clothes are black, whether from the rain or blood Yixing doesn't know. As he steps closer and squats down beside the body he can see red streaks of blood matted into the guy's hair too and his gut twinges with something that might be akin to pity.

 

He’s got a pretty face, this blondie. Kinda elfin. It makes Yixing wonder whether he’s one of Suho’s new boys. He looks again. Nah. Blondie’s face is certainly twinky enough but he looks too well fed for that kind of thing – the punters usually like them a little bit more on the skeletal side for whatever reason.

 

 

The guy is unconscious but moaning and shivering and Yixing wonders to himself how many people have walked past and left him there before Yixing showed up.

 

He half considers it himself. He could just carry on. He owes this boy nothing, and that’s generally how these things work in this neighbourhood. Give a little, get a little. An eye for an eye - that shit. And this boy hasn’t got anything, except a concussion and pneumonia. Yixing sighs.

 

"I shouldn't be doing this." He mutters to himself as he positions himself to lift the body up. "I don't know this guy. He could be fucking triad for all I know."

 

He looks down at the face now pressed against his chest and sighs heavily once again. This will definitely not be one of his better decisions, he can tell that now. He can't afford to have any attention drawn to him and whoever this guy is - druggie, mafioso or simple runaway - is sure to bring trouble.

 

Well, too late now. He can feel hot breath against his collar bone and the press of Blondie’s chest against his own as they breathe and he knows he’s not going to be able turn the stranger away now. He’s real now – not just a body at the side of the road but a person. Blondie.

 

 

Slowly Yixing begins the trek through the rain back to his flat, passenger nestled safely in his arms.

 

 

Xxx

 

In the harsh lighting of Yixing's bathroom the guy looks even younger. Innocent. Thick black lashes stand out starkly against white skin. He looks good, despite the blood matted into his hair and the bruises blossoming black and blue across his cheekbones.

 

"Hey." Yixing calls softly. "Hey." He taps the guy's cheeks. Once, twice. Just enough to get him to wake up.

 

The guy doesn’t stir beyond shivering harder and groaning a little louder. Yixing sighs. He doesn’t want to leave the Blondie to wake up on his own – there’s no way of telling where he could be injured, the black hoodie and jeans meaning that any blood stains would be impossible to spot, and Yixing can’t afford to wait. He’s not gone through all the effort of lugging an unconscious body back to his flat just to have it die on him. Nuh-uh. That’s the last thing he needs.

 

“Hey!” He says louder, tapping Blondie’s cheek a bit harder. “Wake up, sunshine.”

 

Blondie’s head lolls to the side before rising up slowly. As it does so the guy’s eyes flicker open and roll back into his head, whites flickering, before snapping back into their proper place. They are brown and hazy, as if unfocussed, fixed dead on Yixing’s face.

 

It’s disturbing.

 

It’s then he realises how close they are. Yixing’s hand is still hovering by Blondie’s cheek and he can pick out the crow’s feet starting to form at the corners of Blondie’s eyes. Slowly he sits back onto his haunches. He doesn’t want to frighten Blondie – he hates dealing with hysterical people.

 

 

Blondie doesn’t move, doesn’t so much as bat one of those overly long eyelashes. His eyes flicker over the bathroom – no doubt taking in the cracks in the tiles and the damp that refuses to ease no matter what Yixing does – before fixing themselves back on Yixing. He’s still shivering and Yixing tuts impatiently.

 

 

“You should take your clothes off.” He motions to Blondie’s sodden hoodie. “They’re wet.”

 

He gets a slow blink in response. The guy pulls absentmindedly at the hem of his hoodie as if he’s only just realised that it’s wet and Yixing gets the feeling that he’s never going to get Blondie out of his clothes if he doesn’t help.

 

“May I help?”

 

Yixing’s hands hover over Blondie’s, waiting for a sign. Blondie doesn’t move. The look in his eyes however, his eyes say ‘touch me and you’ll regret it’. Yixing barely holds back a snort. Big words for a man that can’t even pull his own jumper off.

 

“I’m Yixing.” He says. “I found you on the side of the road and I brought you here,” _because I’m a soft-hearted fool_ “and I’d rather not have you die of pneumonia after all the effort I went to to drag you here.”

 

The words themselves are harsh but they come out a lot less firm than Yixing would have liked. Almost soft, joking. Yixing wasn’t joking. He was deathly serious but he can’t be bothered to care too much, not when Blondie’s lips twitch upwards momentarily in what might have been a smile.

 

“Go on then.” Blondie croaks out. He sounds like one of the old men that hang around the mah-jong boards – voices ruined by the god-knows-how many cigarettes they smoke a day. It surprises Yixing. It doesn’t suit Blondie’s pixie face at all. The teasing, lilting quality though – that definitely fits the impish glimmer in Blondie’s eyes.

Yixing rolls his eyes and moves to tug Blondie out of his clothes. It’s hard going. They’re wet and heavy, and the guy really is in no shape to help out at all. It feels like trying to peel the skin off of a giant life-size doll.

 

“You got a name, Blondie?” Yixing grunts as he finally tugs Blondie’s t-shirt over his head. Blondie’s skin is pale and dotted with red marks – likely from a bad beating – and some are even starting to blossom mauve but there’s no cuts, no knife wounds, much to Yixing’s relief.

 

There’s a pause.

 

“Lao Fan.” Blondie answers eventually. He winces as his arms drop back to his sides and Yixing makes a mental note to get Kyungsoo to check him over tomorrow.

 

Blondie – Lao Fan – doesn’t offer any more and Yixing doesn’t ask. He seems to have expended all the little energy he had and sits slumped against the bath tub, panting heavily. Yixing drapes a towel over his head and shoulders to keep him warm as he gets to work on the more difficult task of removing Lao Fan’s jeans, talking only to get him to shift to help in easing them down his legs.

 

Eventually the stranger sits nude except for the towel and his boxers. He looks out at Yixing from under his towel-robe with big, wide eyes and it makes Yixing want to snap at him because he looks so weak and rabbit-like and helpless. It makes Yixing want to take care of him and he hates it. He can’t afford that kind of thing.

 

“Get up.” He says roughly, tugging Blondie up until he’s draped over one of Yixing’s shoulders. Blondie shivers and Yixing realises that he himself is still in his rain-drenched clothes. He hadn’t noticed.

 

They stumble to Yixing’s bed and Yixing hastily bundles Blondie up in the covers. He had thought about the bath, but honestly he thinks Blondie is about to pass out and he doesn’t want him to drown. Bath can wait for tomorrow and Kyungsoo.

 

He’s proved right not ten minutes later when he himself climbs under his blankets. Lao Fan’s breathing is a bit laboured, but it’s the even breathing of someone very not-conscious. Yixing snorts and presses his back up against Lao Fan’s. If he’s going to have an impromptu houseguest, the least they can do is provide some heating.

 

Xxx

 

 

Lu Han wakes up in a strange man’s bed.

The bed is small – only a single – and they’re pressed up against each other _everywhere_. It makes Lu Han’s stomach churn.

 

He wants to push this stranger away but he’s hot, so hot he’s feverish and everything aches. Keeping his eyes open is too difficult, let alone escaping this stranger’s grasp.

 

_How did he get here?_

 

He can’t remember. Everything is hazy and dark and cold and he can’t remember. He can’t think. The panic comes pushing up in his gut but it’s swirly and hazy just like everything else and the blackness consumes him.

 

He drifts back into oblivion.

 

XXX

 

Yixing is used to waking up before the sun rises, so when he awakes it’s still dark. There’s an uncomfortable warmth at his side – sticky and sweaty where their skin touches – and Yixing pulls himself away grimacing. At least he can be assured that Blondie or whatever he said his name was is still alive. He’s snoring softly.

 

Ugh. Yixing needs a shower and some coffee to deal with this. Not necessarily in that order. Still in his slightly damp boxers he makes his way to the kitchen to flick on the kettle. He picks up the phone.

 

_No new messages._

 

Nothing new there.

 

He presses three on speed dial and waits for Kyungsoo to pick up.

 

“What?” An irascible voice crackles over the line. “You do know what fucking time it is, right, Yixing?”

 

“Good morning to you too, Soo.” Yixing grins to himself as he pulls the coffee down from its shelf.

“Don’t call me Soo. And it’s five thirty, you heathen. This better be fucking good.”

 

“I wouldn’t say good…”

 

“Xing.” Kyungsoo says with a warning laced into his tone.

 

“Fine. I brought a guy back to my flat last night-,” Kyungsoo chokes on the other side of the line, “- not like that you perve- and he’s not in a good way. Found him passed out at the side of the road in the storm last night.”

 

“A beating?”

 

“That’s my best guess. Either way, could you come and have a look at him?”

 

A pause.

 

“You know it’s going to cost you.”

 

“Yeah.”

 

Kyungsoo sighs deeply. “I’ll be there in an hour. Try to keep him alive ‘til then.”

 

Xxx

 

Kyungsoo does not have the best bedside manner. No one goes to see him for that though. They go to him because he’s the best medic the slums has and Yixing’s willing to bet if he’d ever gone to university he’d be the best medic the city has, but kids from the slums don’t go to uni so it’s a moot point.

 

“Has he been sick?” Is the first thing Kyungsoo says to Yixing as he barges through the doorway into Yixing’s flat.

 

“No, don’t think so.” Yixing answers immediately, too used to Kyungsoo’s way to be startled. “There was none on his clothing and he’s not thrown up since he’s been here. He’s in the bedroom, by the way.”

 

Kyungsoo gives him a brief nod and scurries off in the direction of the bedroom with a look in his eye that would frighten even the hardiest of men. Yixing snickers. Blondie is about to get a very rude awakening.

 

Soon enough a frightened yelp can be heard from the direction of the bedroom. Yixing snickers into his coffee. He should probably go and make sure Kyungsoo’s not frightening the poor boy half to death but well… if Blondie’s well enough to yelp he can survive a few more minutes of Soo’s ‘treatment’.

 

When he finally saunters his way into the bedroom he finds Blondie shirtless and Kyungsoo listening very intently through a stethoscope to Lao Fan’s chest. The light streams through the paper-thin curtains and onto Blondie’s hair, making it glow in ways that look like Lao Fan has glow stick head. It’s not making his skin any less grey-green looking either.

 

“How’s he looking, Doc?” He says, leaning against the wall with his mug of coffee cradled in both hands. “Not likely to die today?”

 

Kyungsoo glowers at him to be quiet. He finishes his inspection in silence (and in his own time, as Kyungsoo does) before he turns to Yixing.

 

“I don’t think he’s got any internal bleeding, so count yourself lucky. He’s not dying any time soon. His lungs sound a bit weak, but that’s probably partly due to the bruising. He’s got a slight fever too – I’d keep an eye on that.”

 

“Yessir. Anything else?”

 

“Keep him warm and well fed, and give him one these every three to four hours. They’ll help with the pain and the fever.” Kyungsoo places a small, inconspicuous pill bottle into Yixing’s outstretched hand as he brushes past Yixing on his way to the door.

 

Ah, the other reason everyone always goes to Kyungsoo. He always has the best drugs. (No one asks how he comes by them though. Never ask.)

 

“I’ll see myself out.” Kyungsoo calls from down the hallway. “And you owe me one!”

 

“Yeah, yeah.” Yixing yells. He doesn’t move from where he’s leaning against the wall.

 

“You’re welcome!” He hears, and then the slam of the front door.

 

“Isn’t that good news? You aren’t dying.” He grins at Blondie. “You can be on your merry way, do whatever it was you were doing before this whole thing happened.”

 

Lao Fan looks like he’s about to vomit.

 

“Please let me stay.” Blondie pleads, eyes desperate and feverish. “I have nowhere else to go.”

 

Yixing looks doubtful at that. Blondie certainly doesn’t look homeless to him – he’s yet to take on that sunken, hungry look those who live on the streets get.

 

“Where were you staying before?” He asks. “You should go back there.”

“I can’t.” Blondie says desperately. “It was a hostel, they won’t take me without any money. I don’t have a job, all that I had was on me last night.”

 

“No family? No friends?” Seriously, how much clearer can be say he doesn’t want the guy to stay? He’s done his good Samaritan bit now, thank you very much and now he would like to be free of any more responsibility – not least because having a stranger round the house means he’s a thousand times more likely to be caught.

 

Blondie either doesn’t seem to pick up on his reluctance or doesn’t care, however.

 

“Got kicked out.” He supplies. “And all my friends aren’t from around here. I’ve got no one. _Please._ ”

 

The whole conversation Lao Fan has been looking dead into Yixing’s eyes, but as soon as he starts talking about his ‘home’ his head drops forward towards the floor. It’s telling. So his home life embarrasses him? Maybe Yixing can use that.

 

“Did he beat you?”

 

“What?” Lao Fan looks up, startled.

 

“Your father, did he beat you?” Yixing repeats slowly.

 

“No!” Blondie says, outraged. “Of course not!”

 

“So why are you so ashamed to talk about your family, huh? Mother’s a prostitute? Don’t worry, I won’t judge you for it; it’s pretty common round here.”

 

“My mother is not a prostitute!” Blondie protests.

 

“Drug dealer dad? Alcoholic? Junkie mum?” Yixing grins to himself. This really is fun. “Come on, Lao Fan, just tell me. Otherwise I’m going to keep on guessing and I really could do this all day.”

 

“I’m gay!” Lao Fan cries. “I’m gay, alright. That’s why I was kicked out.”

 

Suddenly Yixing realises he’s trembling under the blankets. The guy’s eyes are wide and watery as they stare at Yixing and it can only mean one thing. Lao Fan is _terrified_.

 

“Your parents kicked you out for being gay?” He asks slowly. Blondie gives him a shaky nod.

 

“I don’t care if you’re gay.” He says bluntly. _It’d be a bit hypocritical of him to care._

 

“You don’t?” Blondie doesn’t quite look like he believes it.

 

“I’m bi.” Yixing tells him. “So no, I don’t care.”

 

Blondie looks stunned and Yixing wants to snort. What, did Lao Fan think he was the only gay man out there? Silence falls over them. Lao Fan still seems to be processing that he’s not being hunted with a pitchfork and Yixing just watches him. There’s something about Lao Fan that seems off – his hair, though a shocking colour, is well dyed and soft for a start. Possibly a salon job. There’s this air about him that screams different. The way he speaks – all perfect round tones, no accent at all – Beijing standard. The way he makes himself vulnerable without a second thought and trusts that Yixing won’t take advantage.

 

“You aren’t from around here, are you?” Yixing breaks the silence and Lao Fan looks like he’s been caught. “How did you end up in the slums?”

 

“It’s stupid, but I just wanted to be as far away from them as possible, so I got on the first bus that passed and ended up here. Pretty dumb, huh?” Lao Fan’s smile is self-deprecating and acid and it gnaws away at something in Yixing’s stomach.

 

Is it pity? Or compassion? Yixing can’t really remember what those feel like anymore.

 

“Oh for fuck’s sake. You can stay. But only until you can find a job.” Yixing grumps.

 

Blondie’s smile, even with the ashen, sweaty skin and fever, is enough to blind Yixing. It’s enough to make him not care at that moment that later he’s going to be regretting this decision later.

 

If taking him in is mistake number one, letting him stay is mistake number two.

Xxx

 

Living with Blondie – Lao Fan, whatever – isn’t very different to Yixing living alone in the beginning. He mostly sleeps. He wakes up to eat and relieve himself and that’s about it for the first week. Yixing has to remember to get more groceries when he goes out, but that’s about it. Nothing drastic.

 

Things do change though. It’s inevitable. It starts with Yixing coming back to Lao Fan curled up on the sofa in one of Yixing’s hoodies and too-short sweatpants reading a book. Yixing’s favourite book. It’s worn and the cover’s faded from the amount of times he’s re-read it. He doesn’t like to see it in someone else’s hands.

 

“I’m sorry.” Lao Fan says out of the blue. “I was just bored and it’s one of my favourites. I’d been meaning to reread it for years, but I never got round to it. Forgive me?”

 

“Forgive you for what?” Yixing mutters as he dumps the groceries in the kitchen. Behind him he can hear Lao Fan ease himself off Yixing’s creaky couch and make his way into the kitchen.

 

“Borrowing the book without your permission.” Blondie says as he starts picking food out of the brown paper bags and stuffing them in cupboards. It’s weird to think he knows where everything goes. Yixing has never lived with someone before.

 

“It’s fine.” He replies shortly.

 

Lao Fan laughs. “Yes, that’s why you’re looking at the broccoli like you want it to burst into flames. I’m sorry. Next time I’ll ask.”

 

Yixing looks up from the broccoli to look at Lu Han. He’s still putting things away from the shopping bags, focussed completely on whatever he has in his hand, which allows Yixing to get a good look at his profile.

 

It’s strong. A sharp jawline contrasts with his little pixie nose and it’s cute. Yixing looks away quickly. He shouldn’t be thinking that his freeloader is cute.

 

The atmosphere in the kitchen is light, not awkward at all and somehow Yixing feels both uneasy and comfortable at the same time. This is strange. He shouldn’t feel so comfortable around a complete stranger but he can’t help himself. The aura around Lao Fan is very inviting somehow. Warm.

 

“I was thinking,” Lao Fan starts, “about looking for a job. Does the place where you work have any vacancies?”

 

Yixing has never told Lao Fan where he works. It’s not that Lao Fan doesn’t know – Yixing is out every day from eight til five, it’s pretty obvious he’s got some type of work – but it strikes Yixing again how naïve Lao Fan is. Here in the slums professional gangster can count as work, but here Lao Fan is asking if he can join Yixing’s work without even knowing what Yixing does for a living.

 

Lao Fan is really lucky Yixing just works in the repair shop downtown.

 

“Got any experience fixing cars?” Yixing asks.

 

“No.” Lao Fan says, with a grin. “But I make a pretty mean espresso?”

 

Against his will Yixing laughs. It’s not a mean laugh, it’s a genuine one. He almost doesn’t remember what that sounds like. “That’s not going to get you far on this side of town, Blondie. Got any real skills?”

 

“I know a bit about computers.” Lao Fan offers as he takes the jar out of Yixing’s hands and places it on the top shelf. “Apart from that, not much I’m afraid.”

 

Yixing hums thoughtfully. This kid is useless. How old did he say he was again? How had he survived up to now if he has no skills? “To be honest I don’t think I know anywhere that’s hiring, but the best way to get a job around here is just to ask. Go into shops, see if they’ve got an opening.”

 

“Okay.” Blondie says. “I’ll go while you’re at work.”

 

The corners of his eyes wrinkle up when he smiles, Yixing notices. It’s nice. It takes away from the ethereal elf thing Blondie’s got going on. Makes him look more human.

 

“Okay.” He replies dumbly.

 

“Okay.” Lao Fan says again.

 

Then they are grinning at each other over the brown paper grocery bags and Yixing has no idea why. It’s dumb and silly and Yixing can’t remember the last time he felt this relaxed.

 

Xxx

 

Lao Fan’s promise to find work is completed in record time. He apparently manages to use his elf-powers to charm the sweet old lady that runs the local grocers that she needs a shop boy to help her with the heavy lifting and comes back home to Yixing with a smile, holding his ratty green apron proudly.

 

“She said she’d pay me cash-in-hand too,” He beams, “So I can stop wearing your clothes soon.”

 

Yixing pouts a little at that. It was fun seeing Lao Fan wander around in trousers too short for him and shirts that were too baggy.

 

Very soon they fall into a routine that’s almost sickeningly domestic – they wake up in the morning, Lao Fan on the sofa and Yixing on the bed. Lao Fan makes coffee while Yixing takes a quick shower and then Yixing makes breakfast while Lao Fan showers, because while Lao Fan’s coffee was possibly heaven sent, his cooking is enough to kill small animals. Yixing knows this because he tried to feed it to the pigeons and they’d keeled over as soon as the food had touched their gullets.

 

They eat breakfast in silence before heading out together. Yixing always ends up walking Lao Fan to the grocery shop where he works because it’s on the way to the garage and he doesn't quite trust that Lao Fan won’t get mugged again. At least if they see him with Yixing most people will know to leave well alone.

 

The journey usually consists of Lao Fan rambling on about one thing or another – last time it was how to make the perfect latte, this time it’s how amazing that new boy group sound – and Yixing joins in whenever he feels like it. Sometimes he’s content to just listen (he really knows nothing about pop music, but hearing Lao Fan gush over how hot the boys are in such and such a group is really unbearably cute) and sometimes he’ll add his two cents. (Like how the new Jaguar really _isn’t_ better than the Mercedes, thank you very much.) Lao Fan doesn’t seem to care either way. He just seems to be happy that Yixing walks with him.

 

After work Yixing will pop by to pick Lao Fan up as he closes (often carry groceries he’s picked out for them) then it’s a repeat of their morning walk back to their flat. (He’s even started calling it their flat in his mind. He must be going mad.) Yixing makes dinner, Lao Fan washes up, and then they settle down on the sofa to read. Lao Fan had gone exploring one day and found a second hand book shop tucked away in an alley and since then has been spending probably half his pay on books even though Yixing keeps reminding him that they really don’t have anywhere to put all these books.

 

It’s all very strange to Yixing. If you’d told him two months ago that he’d be living in some domestic idyll with a relative stranger he would have laughed in your face. Now it’s getting hard to remember what life was even like before Lao Fan fell into it.

 

It’s scary. It’s most scary that he never wants it to end.

 

Xxx

 

Yixing knows he’s going nowhere in life. He has no qualifications, no training, and all he’s good at are cars. He’s going to be earning the same wage for the rest of his life if he’s lucky enough to keep his job at all and it’s shit.

 

He’s from the slums. Born and raised. And in the slums he has seen the worst of everything. Poverty, prostitution, pain. It’s all here, plain as day. Yixing has lived here twenty four years now and he knows he’s never going to escape because he knows the way the world works and he knows that the people at the top are never going to let him escape. They want to keep him here, downtrodden and quiet, too busy fighting to survive to make waves.

 

Well Yixing won’t have it. What gives men born rich the right to use the poor to make themselves richer? Nothing except the power of money. So Yixing takes it away from them.

 

He’d started small, petty theft really. Then he’d moved on to banks and armoured cars when he’d met Tao at work. The guy was from the country, an expert at Kung Fu, and had an axe to grind with the boys upstairs. Destroying a family’s livelihood to make profit can do that.

 

Soon after Minseok had found him. He wasn’t like Tao, tall and imposing, but something about him had screamed determination and power. He was a hacking expert and had promised to bring them to a whole new level of robbery.

 

And so their team had been formed. Minseok the brains, Tao and Yixing the brawn. Together they acted out a twisted parody of Robin Hood – stealing from the rich and giving it to the poor – and honestly it’s the only thing that’s kept Yixing going the last couple of years. Until Lao Fan.

 

But now Lao Fan’s here Yixing hasn’t been able to sneak out as much. He manages, especially on days when Lao Fan is especially tired, but he hasn’t been by to see Minseok nearly as much as he should. The man is starting to pry.

 

He knows Yixing brought a guy home. He doesn’t know he’s still there. He’d be furious if he knew which is why Yixing isn’t planning on telling him. What Minseok doesn’t know can’t hurt him.

 

It’ll be fine. Lao Fan sleeps like the dead after work at the shop – it’s like he’s never done a day of manual labour in his life – so the chances of him waking up are slim. Yixing always changes out of his Robin Hood clothes before he gets home anyway. It’s just the bow that gives him away.

 

 

It won’t be fine, and Yixing knows it. But he can’t give up Lao Fan and he can’t give up being Lay, his fat-cat destroying alter ego, so this is the way it has to be. He knows it’s going to end badly. He just can’t bring himself to care.

 

xxx

 

“Who’s the girl?” Minseok demands, not looking away from his monitor, the next time Yixing lets himself into his flat.

 

“Nice to see you too, Minseok.” Yixing dumps his coat over Minseok’s sofa. “And there’s no girl.”

 

“You’re all smiley and shit, there’s definitely a girl.”

 

Yixing snorts. Minseok narrows his eyes.

 

“Or a guy.” He says cleverly. Yixing rolls his eyes, but something must tip Minseok off because the next words out of his mouth are, “Oh my god, it’s a guy isn’t it.”

 

“It’s not a guy. There is no guy.” Yixing negates firmly, but Minseok is looking away from his computer screen now. His gaze is fixed on Yixing like a hawk to a rabbit and Yixing’s stomach sinks.

 

“So who is it?” Minseok asks. He doesn’t wait for an answer. “It’s got to be someone new… It’s not me or Tao because just no, so it must be someone you met recently. A new guy at work?” Minseok looks him over, scrutinising. “No, not your type. You like the damsel in distress type.”

 

Yixing chokes on nothing. “What the fuck, Minnie? ‘Damsels in distress’?”

 

“Goes with your whole, Robin Hood, gotta right the wrongs thing.” Minseok replies cheekily. Then his eyes light up. “Oh, I’ve got it. That guy you saved, the blond one. It’s him isn’t it? I’m right, tell me I’m right.”

 

Yixing stares at him, mouth agape. “How did you know that?”

 

“I’m a genius.” Minseok says haughtily. “It’s not my fault you’re too blind to see it most of the time.”

 

“Yeah, yeah.” Yixing rolls his eyes.

 

Suddenly Minseok sobers. “He’s living with you, isn’t he?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“For how long?”

 

“Since I found him.”

 

“Since you found him?” Minseok shouts. “Are you crazy? It’s a miracle he hasn’t found out yet! What the hell do you think you’re doing?”

 

Yixing throws his hands up in defeat. “I know, I know. It’s stupid of me, but I-”

 

“But nothing, Zhang Yixing. This is all going to go tits up, mark my words.” Minseok warns.

 

“I _know_ Minnie, but what can I do? I can’t give this up and I can’t kick him out, so what do I do?” Yixing hates how helpless he sounds. He’d never have been like this before Lao Fan, but Lao Fan has changed so much.

 

Minseok’s angry look softens.

 

“Pray that Lady Luck is on your side, my friend. I’ve never seen you like this, not with anyone so you better be sure this guy is worth it because it’s my arse in the firing line too.” His tone is soft and joking but Yixing can hear the serious undercurrent to Minseok’s words.

 

 _Don’t fuck up._ He’s saying. _Don’t fuck up, because if Lay goes down, we all go down with him._

 

xxx

 

Three weeks later and Yixing is suddenly very aware of the fact he is standing in his living room with a bow in his hand and Lao Fan is looking at him like he’s a criminal. It shouldn’t hurt. He is a criminal. Everyone around here is. He just got used to Lao Fan looking at him like he was something _good_.

 

“I won’t tell.” Is the first thing that comes out of Lao Fan’s mouth.

 

“How do I know that?” Yixing’s grip on his bow tightens.

 

“I owe you my life, Yixing.”

 

“That’s not enough.”

 

Lao Fan’s eyes widen to comical proportions. “How much deeper can a debt get?”

 

Yixing doesn’t know whether this naivety is real or just a fabrication, an imitation. Either way, it’s not gonna work on Yixing.

 

“Except you’re alive, aren’t you? You’ve got no need of me any more.”

 

“You said it’s an eye for an eye around here, right?” Lao Fan says desperately. “So you do something for me, and I won’t tell. Deal?”

 

Lay lets out a short, sharp bark of laughter. “Of course.”

 

“Hey.” Lao Fan’s face twists up angrily. “ _You’re_ the one who won’t trust me to keep this a secret, even though I owe you my life. _You’re_ the one making this into something ugly. Not me.”

 

“Just tell me what you want.” Yixing has no time for Lao Fan’s mind games right now. He needs to do this while he’s still Lay – while he’s still ruthless, before Yixing has time to come sinking back through and gets sucked in by Lao Fan’s big, wide innocent eyes.

 

“I’m looking for someone.” Lao Fan says. “Someone very important to me.”

 

“I didn’t take you for one set on revenge.”

 

“He’s my brother.” He corrects himself immediately. “Half-brother. He’s six. I don’t know his name, but I know his mother’s. Help me find him.” It’s supposed to be a demand, but it comes out more as a plea and it strikes Yixing once again that Lao Fan is not from this neighbourhood.

 

It’s not much. Lao Fan could still get rid of him once he’d got what he wanted. After all, he’d have to keep Yixing’s secret forever. A boy could be found in a couple of weeks. If he’s still alive.

 

“I’ll leave after that, you’ll never see or hear from me again. I promise.” Lao Fan begs. “I’ll be far away and you won’t have to worry about me keeping your secret because even if I were to tell it,” Yixing’s scowl darkens, “ _which I won’t_ \- nobody would know you anyway!”

 

“So that’s why you’re really here. Not because your dad kicked you out but to find this kid?”

 

Lao Fan shrugs. “I wasn’t lying about that. My father really doesn’t approve of that kind of thing. I more ran away than I was kicked out though.”

 

“Your dad sounds like a right piece of work.”

 

Lao Fan shifts awkwardly on his feet. It’s obvious he doesn’t feel comfortable hearing his father talked about that way, even if his silence probably means he agrees with Yixing.

 

“So is that a yes?” He says instead of acknowledging Yixing’s statement.

 

“It’s a yes.” He sets his bow down on the table beside him. The noise it makes against the wood makes Lao Fan flinch. “We’ll start tomorrow.”

 

 

Xxx

 

The next day Yixing phones Minseok. “I’ve got something for you to work on.”

 

There’s a deep sigh on the other end of the line. “Why do I get the feeling you’ve landed yourself in trouble and now I’m the one having to bail you out?”

 

“I need you to find someone.”

 

“Who? A shady business man? A contact for a job? I’m telling you though, I’m not dealing with the Mafia. Not even for you.”

 

Yixing snorts. “I don’t think this guy’s a Mafioso, Seok. He’s six.”

 

“You’re wanting me to find a kid? Jesus Yixing, tell me you didn’t knock some bird up.”

 

“I didn’t knock some bird up.” Yixing deadpans.

 

“That’s hardly reassuring.” Minseok grumbles.

 

Yixing sighs. This is going nowhere and he knows it won’t get anywhere until he tells Minseok what he wants to know. Fucking Minseok and his need to nosy in all of Yixing’s business like an overbearing grandma.

 

“You know the guy I took in.”

 

“Aha! I knew it had something to do with him. You’re getting soft in your old age, XingXing.” Minseok teases. He doesn’t seem to realise that Lao Fan knows about their little operation and Yixing breathes a sigh of relief.

 

“Yeah, yeah, whatever.” He says, more blithely than he feels. “He wants to find his kid brother. Half-brother. Something. You think you can help with that?”

 

There’s a pause on the other end of the line. Yixing knows Minseok isn’t thinking about whether he’s going to accept – he had him from the moment he told him he needed to do something. No, this is more sinister than that.

 

This is Minseok being his mother. This is Minseok working out how he can meet Lao Fan to make sure he’s good enough for Yixing. This is not good.

 

“You should bring him in.” Here he goes. “I’ll need to talk to him, find out what he knows.”

 

“And you can’t do that over the phone?”

 

“I could do,” Minseok admits easily, “But I’m curious as to who’s got you so wrapped around their little finger that you’re calling in a favour from me.”

 

Yixing groans. “And this is the only way you’ll do it?”

“Yup!” Minseok says brightly. “Got it in one.”

 

“Fine.” Yixing replies through gritted teeth. “We can be there in a couple of hours. Happy?”

 

“Ecstatic.” Yixing can hear the victory in Minseok’s voice and has a sinking feeling in his chest that this is really not going to be a meeting he’ll enjoy.

 

Xxx

 

The walk over to Minseok’s is deathly silent. It’s not one of the silences that Yixing enjoys, warm and cocooning. This is frosty and Yixing hates it. He knows Lao Fan is pissed at him for not trusting him but there’s nothing he can do about that. It’s how he was raised, it’s all he knows. And Lao Fan seems to be forgetting that he is really a stranger to Yixing.

 

“Minseok can be a little… abrupt.” Yixing warns him when they reach the door.

 

“Minseok?” Lao Fan spaces out for a second.

 

“My friend.” Yixing clarifies. “The computer expert I told you about.”

 

“Ah, right.”

 

Yixing lets himself and Lao Fan in and then closes the door behind himself.

 

“Minseok!” He calls. “Might as well get this over with.” He mutters under his breath.

 

There’s a shuffling sound from the kitchen and then Minseok’s little round head pokes round the corner. “Hi!” He chirps. His eyes widen as he takes a look at Lao Fan. “This is him?” He asks incredulously.

Yixing rolls his eyes again. “Minseok, this is Lao Fan, Lao Fan this is Minseok. I’m sorry, he’s a little strange.”

Lao Fan looks a little worse for wear and Yixing is hoping Minseok hasn’t scared him too much. He’s been relatively polite, as he goes.

“Ah,” Minseok says. “Lao Fan, was it?” There’s a strange intonation to that sentence that Yixing doesn’t quite catch the meaning of but it’s over before he can blink. “I’ve just made some coffee, would you like some?”

“I’d love some.” Lao Fan says, still reserved.

 

“Coming right up!” Minseok’s head disappears back into the kitchen. There’s some clanking – Tao’s probably put all Minseok’s cups on the top shelf again – and then Minseok reappears with two cups of coffee and one of tea. He hands them out and motions for them all to take a seat.

 

“So tell me about your brother.” Minseok says as he sips his coffee. “What do you know?”

 

“Not very much.” Lao Fan says apologetically. “He’s my half-brother by my father and his mother is called ‘Oh Chanmi’. I was lead to believe she was a prostitute, but I don’t know whether that’s true. He should be about six years of age by now.”

 

Minseok hums thoughtfully. “Would he have your father’s name?”

 

Lao Fan shakes his head. “My father would never have allowed him to take the family name, so he must have his mother’s.”

 

“Do you know what part of the slums they lived in?”

 

“I had an address in my wallet, but it got stolen. The general address was South Side, I think. Orchard lane?”

 

“That’s right slap bang in the red light district, so I don’t think you’re wrong about his mother being a prostitute.” Minseok says encouragingly. “I’ll put some feelers out and see what I can find. I’m not promising anything, mind you.”

 

Lao Fan’s face lights up. “So you’ll do it? Thank you, thank you. Even if you don’t find anything, this is still more than I’ve managed to do up ‘til now. How can I repay you?”

 

“Don’t worry about it, Lao Fan.” Yixing says from the other side of the sofa. “I’ve sorted it. You’ve got nothing he wants, anyway.”

 

“Are you sure?” Lao Fan worries his bottom lip. “I owe you so much already.”

 

“What did we say?” Yixing reminds him. “You don’t owe me anything.” He’s very aware of the fact that Minseok is listening very carefully to their conversation and he doesn’t want him to know that Lao Fan knows he’s Lay. “I’m sorry Minseok, we’re going to have to go, we still have work.”

 

“Sure,” Minseok says, smiling widely. “I’ll let you know if I find anything.”

 

“Thank you again.” Lao Fan bows to Minseok as they make their way to the door and Yixing has to grit his teeth because he does not want those two spending any more time together. Who knows what Minseok could weasel out of Lao Fan in time.

“Oh, it was my pleasure.” Minseok says easily. “And by the way Yixing, I definitely approve.”

 

Yixing feels his face grow hot and quickly pushes Lao Fan out the door, ignoring his whines of ‘what did he mean by that?’ ‘what does he approve of?’. He hates Minseok.

 

Xxx

 

One week later, after a week of a nervous and jittery Lao Fan playing on his nerves, Minseok calls.

 

He has news, he says, but he doesn’t know if Lao Fan will like it.

 

Yixing quickly calls Lao Fan over and puts the phone on speakerphone. The boy’s name is Oh Sehun, Minseok tells them. He’s six years old and is currently residing in the South Side Orphanage for Boys. His mother passed away a year ago. Suspected suicide.

 

At this point Yixing can see Lao Fan fighting back tears. He’s such an empathetic, kind person and Yixing wonders again how people like him can still exist in this world.

 

Minseok gives them an address for the orphanage and a warning that it isn’t the nicest place (which makes Lao Fan tear up all over again). Lao Fan can’t stop thanking him and telling him that he will never be able to repay him for this which has Yixing feeling quite uncomfortable. He ends the call abruptly.

 

“I’ll book some time off then.” He says.

 

“You’ll come with me?” Lao Fan says incredulously. “You’d do that?”

 

“Of course I would.” Yixing replies gruffly. “I said I’d help you find him, didn’t I? I’ll see it through to the end.”

 

“Thank you.” Lao Fan says, reaching over to squeeze Yixing’s hand. His fingers are soft and warm and Yixing shivers despite himself. “You’re a good person Yixing.”

Yixing wishes he could believe that himself.

 

xxx

 

They turn up at the orphanage on a rather dreary day. It doesn’t help the already rather worn-down building any and out of the corner of his eye he can see it clearly written on Lao Fan’s face how appalling he thinks it is.

 

“Let’s go inside then, shall we?” He says, stuffing his hands against his pockets against the chill.

 

Lao Fan gives him a determined nod.

 

They walk up to the office together. The woman running the place is neither friendly nor helpful, but she does know immediately who Lao Fan is talking about.

 

“Oh Sehun.” She says, voice old and cracked with hardship. “A troublemaker, that one.”

 

“He’s my brother, Ma’am.” Lao Fan replies firmly, “and I would like to see him.”

 

The hag sighs, and mutters, “Don’t say I didn’t warn you. Follow me.”

 

They follow her down what seems like a labyrinth of corridors until they come to a rather dismal room. It appears to be an attempt at a play room – there’s a few broken toys about the place and scribbles all over the walls. Yixing can see Lao Fan try to hide his disgust.

 

“Oh Sehun!” The woman shouts. “Stop playing with Jongin, there’s a man who’d like to meet you.”

 

A sullen looking child near the centre of the room sat next to another child with wide eyes shouts back. “Don’t wanna. I’m playing with Jongin.”

 

Yixing sees the tick in the woman’s forehead and he can see that she’s about to go over there and physically haul Sehun to Lao Fan if she has to, but Lao Fan places a gentle hand on her arm and says, “Don’t worry ma’am, I can go to him.”

 

He walks through the crowds of children like a swan, floating above them all. Maybe he really is an elf. He crouches down next to Sehun and the other boy, Jongin, and smiles at them.

 

“Hi.” He says. “My name is Lu Han, what’re yours?”

 

(Had Yixing heard correctly? It sounded like Lao Fan had said his name wrong for a second there – it’s hard to hear over the hubbub of the room.)

 

“I’m Sehun.” The sullen one says. “And this is Jongin. He’s my best friend.” Jongin looks very pleased with this statement.

 

“It’s very nice to meet you, Sehun and Jongin.” Lao Fan continues. “May I play with you for a while?”

 

The two boys look at each other, clearly having some kind of conversation only they themselves can understand. It strikes Yixing then they probably have never been asked what they want, only told.

 

The quieter one, Jongin, nods.

 

“Really?” Lao Fan’s smile widens. “Thank you.”

 

Yixing watches them play from the door way. The crone has long since gone off somewhere, likely to skin cats or something, so he stands alone. Lao Fan is brilliant with them. He treats them like people, not like they’re stupid. He lets them play with his blond hair, laughing in delight as they run their hands through it and becomes horse for them to ride. He’s the image of a perfect father and Yixing thinks Sehun will be very lucky to have a brother like Lao Fan.

 

As play time ends and the crone comes back to take them back to the exit, Lao Fan leans down and asks Sehun a very important question.

 

“Sehun,” he says, “I haven’t been entirely honest with you. I have come here today not just to play with you, but because I am your brother and I would like it very much if you came and lived with me. Would you like to come and live with me, Sehun?”

 

Sehun glances over at Jongin standing next to him. “Can Jongin come too?” He asks, voice quiet and pleading. Now it’s clear they’re related – Lao Fan has the same puppy eyes as his brother.

 

Yixing would have expected no, but Lao Fan doesn’t even hesitate. “If I am allowed to adopt you both I would be very happy to have you both come and live with me.” He turns to Jongin. “Is that okay, Jongin? Would you like to come and live with me and Sehun if I can adopt you both?”

 

“Yes.” Jongin says shyly, intertwining his fingers with Sehun’s.

Lao Fan positively beams. “Then that’s what I’ll do.” He turns to the hag behind him and asks, straight out, “Can I adopt them both?”

 

The crone looks surprised, but shrugs. “Sure. The both of them are more trouble than they’re worth, but if you want them both you can have them.”

 

Yixing grits his teeth. This woman is talking about children as if they were unruly dogs to be put down. Lao Fan looks just as outraged, but swallows down any protest. He needs to be on her good side to get her to sign the paperwork.

 

“Goodbye Sehun, Jongin. I’ll see you again soon.” Lao Fan says cheerily. “I have to go sort some stuff out with Madam Wu, and I won’t be able to take you home today, but I’ll be back, okay?”

 

The children nod, but it doesn’t seem like it’s sunk in for them yet. As Yixing suspects it won’t for a while. These children are probably used to not getting what they want, as sad as that is, so they no longer expect good things to happen to them. It makes Yixing so angry. He wishes he could take them all home, but he doesn’t even know if they’ll have space for Sehun and Jongin in their flat, let alone the hundreds of children here.

 

_(But he’s forgetting that Lao Fan doesn’t plan to stay. He planned to leave as soon as he found his brother, so where does that leave Yixing?)_

 

The paperwork is frighteningly easy. The hag doesn’t ask them for any proof of identification, nothing to show Lao Fan is really Sehun’s brother, she doesn’t even ask where they’re going to live. It just seems like she’s happy to be rid of them, which is terrible. Lao Fan looks like he’s warring between being glad and wanting to attack this woman for being so callous, and Yixing is about in the same place.

 

“You can pick them up anytime.” She says disinterestedly. “I’ll get them to pack up their stuff.”

 

“Sure.” Lao Fan fakes a smile. “I’ll be over tomorrow then.”

 

“Whenever.” She replies.

 

They are shown out with the same warm attitude as with which they were received and they leave with very mixed feelings about the whole thing, though soon enough Lao Fan is gushing about how cute his ‘two new brothers’ are.

 

It’s not enough to settle the unease that sits, heavy and leaden, in Yixing’s gut.

 

xxx

 

When they get back to the flat and into the door Lao Fan still hasn’t stopped talking about his brother and his friend, Jongin. Yixing knows that for Lao Fan it was love at first sight and it’s evident now more than ever.

 

Lao Fan’s eyes are shining with happiness through the gloom and he looks so cute. He’s looked cute all day – happiness really is a good look on him – and Yixing can’t resist the urge to lean forward and press a simple kiss to Lao Fan’s lips.

 

It’s over far too quickly. Yixing pulls back because he’s not sure Lao Fan wants this – whether he’s felt the same pull Yixing has – and the look on Lao Fan’s face as he does so really isn’t reassuring him. It’s inscrutable, torn somewhere between fear and – wait, was that desire or are Yixing’s eyes playing tricks on him?

 

As Yixing stands there awkwardly, trying to figure out what Lao Fan’s expression means, Lao Fan places his hand on Yixing’s cheek. Yixing freezes. Is this really happening?

 

Lao Fan leans forward, eyes downcast to stare fixatedly at Yixing’s mouth. His eyelashes stand out thick and black against his cheeks. He presses his lips to Yixings. Once, twice. Their lips part, tongues touch.

They pull away minutes, could be hours later, gasping for breath with lips puffy and red. Yixing thinks he really likes this look on Lao Fan.

 

Yixing gently presses himself further into Lu Han's space. They are so, so close but not touching. The heat that radiates of Lao Fan’s body is leeching into Yixing’s t-shirt and Yixing wants so very badly to close those few millimetres and feel every inch of Lao Fan against his skin.

 

"Lao Fan." He says breathily. "Have you ever done this before?"

 

Lao Fan turns his head away, embarrassed. "Not with a boy." He whispers and Yixing is struck again by how beautiful this boy is.

 

"There's no shame in that." Yixing tells him. "You don't have to be perfect with me."  


 


	2. Chapter 2

Yixing awakes to bright light streaming through his curtains and an empty bed. The space beside him his cold and as he lays there, hoping fervently to hear the sound of the shower running or Lao Fan humming to himself as he bustles around the kitchen, all he's greeted by is silence.   
  
  
On the fridge there's a note. Yixing reaches with shaking hands to pick it out from under the football magnet -  _it’s so like Lao Fan to leave it under that particular one_  - and eyes it with trepidation.   
  
  
 _I'm sorry_  it says.  _I can't do this._    
  
  
Yixing balls it up in his fist and doesn't know whether to laugh or to cry.   
  
  
It's not like he doesn't know where Lao Fan will go first. Sehun has always been his priority, right from day one, so there's no doubt in Yixing's mind that he'll head straight for the orphanage. Would he be able to catch Lao Fan there? Does Yixing want to?  
  
  
Last night was amazing. Lu Han was so pliant, so giving underneath him. Yixing has never had sex like that before. He’s had a fair amount of sex, but never like with Lao Fan. There was a connection. It wasn’t just their bodies meeting but something more than that because Yixing had felt it – in every look Lao Fan gave him, every whisper of a touch over Lao Fan’s body he could feel  _emotion_.  
  
  
It scares him shitless.   
  
  
He’s opened himself up to something he can’t understand or control and now it’s been snatched away from him he isn’t sure he wants it back.   
  
  
If it hurts this much now, how would he survive if he found Lao Fan and he rejected Yixing again?  
  
  
xxx   
  
  
"Who's the next target then, boss?" Minseok says idly, chewing gum and swing round in his chair like a five year old rather.   
  
  
Yixing dumps the paper in front of Minseok's nose. "This guy." He says, jabbing his finger harshly into the picture splashed across the front page. "Lu Peng."   
  
  
Minseok lets out a startled whistle. "Things not going so well with your floozy then, I take it?"   
  
  
"What has this got to with Lao Fan?" Yixing snaps. He really hates the way Minseok seems to feel the need to bring his now ex-lodger into every conversation. He especially hates how Minseok seems to pinpoint exactly how he's feeling and why. He doesn't want to think about Lao Fan. Not now. Not for a long while.   
  
  
Minseok seems to notice how the atmosphere turns sour. "Nothing, nothing!" He holds his hands up in a 'I surrender' gesture. "I just thought you must be frustrated to want to go after such a big haul, that's all."   
  
  
"You know him?"   
  
  
"Who doesn't." Minseok types something quickly into the computer in front of him and a file pops up. "The richest man this side of Midas. His security's tighter than a gnat's arse, though, I'm warning you now."   
  
  
"That's okay." Yixing says. “I need a distraction right now.”  
  
  
“Aha! So it  _is_  your boy toy!” Minseok crows.  
  
  
Yixing’s only response is to clock him over the head.   
  
  
xxx   
  
  
Minseok wasn't wrong. Lu Peng's security system makes some of the world banks look like candy stores in comparison. If he weren't so sure of his abilities and his team Yixing might even be a bit worried.   
  
  
"Xiumin, do you hear me?" He says into the mouth piece.   
  
  
"Loud and clear Lay." Minseok's voice crackles in Yixing's ear. "You've got a round of guards just up ahead and then you're clear to break through. I'm just bringing the trip sensors down for you now."   
  
  
"Got it." Yixing counts to five and then sets off at a dead sprint. He scales the wall in a matter of seconds before slipping over and landing silently just as a guard patrol pass. He keeps to the shadows behind them, following them round like a ghost until they pass one of the doors to the side of the house.   
  
  
Checking quickly to see no one has noticed him Yixing brings out his flash light and his set of tools. He makes quick work of the shell casing on the numerical lock. It pops open to reveal sets of wires. He makes a quick inspection for anti-tampering devices and is rewarded with a small box to the left of the main lock mechanism. He grins triumphantly to himself.   
  
  
When he steps inside the building it's clear he's in the kitchen.   
  
  
He's just reached the top of the staircase when he hears someone gasp to the left of him. Immediately he whirls round and grabs the body hiding in the shadows, placing an arm over their mouth to muffle their screams.   
  
  
Except there are no screams, no fighting. The body lies relaxed and calm in his hold and Yixing wonders briefly if the person has fainted already. But no, that can't be.   
  
  
"Lao Fan?" Yixing says incredulously. "What are you doing here?"   
  
  
Lao Fan looks at him. His face is strangely blank and guarded. It’s not a look Yixing has ever seen on Lao Fan before. "I live here."   
  
  
"But you're... You can't...” Yixing flounders. “You’re Lu Peng’s missing son? You’re Lu-"   
  
  
"The study is over to the left." Lu Han cuts him off. "The security system is disabled, so you can just walk right in."   
  
  
"Is this a trap?" Yixing blurts out. He still can't get over the fact that this is Lao Fan standing in front of him, in the house of one of the richest men in the world, and supposedly giving him the greatest haul of his life.   
  
  
"Would you believe me if I said it wasn't?" Lu Han shrugs and gives him a small smile. It's so sad that it makes something in Yixing's chest tighten uncomfortably. He refuses to examine that feeling too closely. "I'd hurry up. The guards will be coming once they realise I'm out of my room."   
  
  
There's something strange and off about that sentence.   
  
  
"Come with me." Yixing hears himself saying. It's a stupid thing to say. He doesn't know the man standing before him - he knows Lao Fan with his stupid scrunched up ugly laugh face and the way he dances as he cooks and his obsession with football - but  _this is not Lao Fan._  They might share a face, but this man's name is  _Lu Han._  This man grew up as one of the people Yixing despises.   
  
  
"I wish I could." Lu Han says. “Believe me when I say I would go with you in a heartbeat if it were just me.”   
  
  
“Lao Fan-”  
  
  
“You should go.” Lu Han hisses desperately. “I’ll distract them.”  
  
  
Yixing hesitates. It’s just a fraction of a second, but it’s enough to make Lu Han’s features become tight with agitation and worry. It’s perverse how happy seeing the second one makes Yixing. If Lu Han can worry about him, he can care about him, right?   
  
  
But there’s no time for too much fanciful reminiscing right now. If Lu Han is right it means guards are going to be here any second and he can’t stay.  
  
  
“Xiumin.” Yixing whispers. “I need an exit.”  
  
  
“On it.” Minseok’s voice crackles in his ear. “Back down the staircase, the guards are out on another round for now.”  
  
  
  
Yixing hurries to follow Minseok’s command, suddenly aware of voices coming from the hallway behind Lu Han. He risks a glance back over his shoulder as he does so, against all his better judgement, and sees Lu Han watching him leave with a look of bitter resignation painted all over his features. He almost wishes he hadn’t looked back.  
  
  
Xxx  
  
  
  
Yixing doesn’t quite remember how he got out of the lion’s den. He’d gone on autopilot completely, allowing Minsoek’s voice in his ear to guide him through to safety without actually registering what he was doing. He stumbles into their makeshift base for the operation, a fake google van a street or two away from the house, ripping off his ear piece as he does so. Immediately Tao in the driver’s seat gets them moving away from the scene of their botched crime.  
  
  
He’s angry. He’s so angry. He’s been angry before, of course he has. He wouldn’t be doing what he’s doing if he weren’t angry all the time, a slow simmer of hate for the world and the pigs that have made it what is today. The ones who think it’s okay to steal from the poor and let people starve while they grow richer. Oh yes, he’s no stranger to anger or hate.   
  
  
This is different though. This anger is boiling hot and sharp like a knife point. It sticks in his gut and twists and roils and it _hurts_.   
  
  
“I’m sorry.” Minseok says gently. “I thought you knew.”  
  
  
“What, that the guy I’d picked up half-dead of the streets in the slums was in fact the son of a billionaire? No, I did not fucking know that. How could I have fucking known that?” Yixing spits angrily.   
  
  
“The Lu’s are pretty famous.” Minseok says very calmly and slowly.  
  
  
“Their son isn’t. Never seen pictures of him in the news.”  
  
  
“Maybe he wasn’t something they wanted to own up to.”  
  
  
That statement makes him pause. Lao- Lu Han had told him his dad had kicked him out for being gay – and Lu Han certainly hadn’t been lying about the being gay part, Yixing has more than enough evidence of that – so maybe being kicked out wasn’t quite the truth but he could see it. Multi-millionaire business mogul ashamed to have a faggot for a son, a son that would have make him look bad in front of all his associates and high-flying, judgemental friends.   
  
  
“How do you know all this?” Yixing says tiredly. “This can’t just be speculation.”  
  
  
“It’s not.” Minseok admits quietly. “I knew Lu Han while we were at university.”  
  
  
Yixing’s not sure if he’s hearing things. “He went to university?” Lu Han had never told him about his education. Yixing had never asked either, but he assumed Lu Han had finished school and that was it, just like Yixing. “Wait,  _you_  went to university?”  
  
  
Minseok eyes him warily. “For computer science. I met Lu Han in one of my business computing lectures. He was quiet before you got to know him.” Minseok smiles fondly. “But you realise soon enough he’d talk your ear off if he were in the mood for it.”  
  
“Sounds like Blondie.” Except Lu Han’s hair had been back to black when he’d seen it. Back to being the perfect heir.  
  
“You aren’t mad?” Minseok asks.  
  
Yixing doesn’t feel mad anymore, just drained. All energy has seeped out of him and he feels weightless, boneless and useless. He laughs brokenly.  
  
“I think after the things I found out tonight Seok what’s one more lie?” He looks up at Minseok and Minseok’s heart clenches. The look in Yixing’s eyes is bleak, desolate. It hurts to watch. “I’m so stupid. So, so stupid. I let him into my home and-”  _my heart_ ”-I didn’t know anything about him and now look what’s happened.”  
  
Minseok gets out of his chair and sits down next to Yixing. Gently he pulls Yixing into a half embrace and it says something that Yixing lets him.   
  
“I’m going to tell you some things you already know about Lu Han, okay? He’s a good person. I know he never wanted to hurt you and that right now he’s probably hurting just as much as you are. I think he wanted to tell you, but he didn’t know how and I think he was scared.” Minseok pets Yixing’s hair as he speaks. “It’s not an excuse, and I know how much he hurt you. I’m just telling you things aren’t so black and white, okay? You can be rich and a good person, just like you can be poor and be a bad person. You can lie to protect others even though you know it’ll hurt them and you can be in love with someone even though you don’t know their past.”  
  
Minseok presses a kiss to the top of Yixing’s head and it makes him feel like he’s five again and his mother is sending him off to school. It’s a warm feeling. And yet it makes the tears that have been threatening to shed ever since Lu Han left roll down his cheeks like waves. Minseok holds him, allowing him to let it all out.  
  
“Lu Han, Lao Fan, Blondie. They’re all the same person, okay? Just remember that.” Minseok mutters into Yixing’s hair.  
  
Honestly, deep down, Yixing knows that. Why else would he have asked Lu Han to come with him? But for now it’s easier to pretend that he doesn’t, to allow himself to be angry and sad, than to deal with the fact that he is irrevocably in love with someone he will never see again.  
  
Xxx  
  
Weeks pass in a haze for Yixing. He goes to his work, buys food, does all the basic things, but anything more than that feels impossible. He spends hours just staring at his kitchen, remembering how Lu Han used to put the groceries on the higher shelves away for him or his singing while he cooked. He finds himself reading and rereading his favourite book because Lu Han had said it was his favourite too.  
  
He wants to be angry. He wants to hate Lu Han for what he’s done to him. He’s turned him into mush. He can’t steal, not when he’s like this. He had turned up once and Minseok had very clearly told him that he can help Minseok with his other work, but that Minseok was going to let him out on another job over his dead body so that was out.  
  
He honestly doesn’t know what to do with himself. He’s never felt so helpless before. In the slums it’s all about power – feeling powerful, being powerful – and his hatred of the fat cats at the top is what had fuelled him this long.   
  
But now he knows that Lu Han is one of them and his hatred isn’t complete. He isn’t fighting against nameless, faceless oppression anymore but  _Lu Han_. Lu Han’s family. Lu Han’s friends too, probably.   
  
He still feels the system is wrong. He still sees homeless people on the streets and his guy churns in indignation that it is allowed to get this far, that the rich get richer and the poor get poorer. It’s just now he doesn’t know how to go about it anymore. In stealing from the rich to give to the poor is he making it more balanced? Or just serving his own selfish ends? The need to feel useful. The need to feel like he’s making a substantial difference. The need for revenge for what he feels these pigs have taken away from him.  
  
He doesn’t know.  
  
Before Lu Han, he never would have even stopped to think about these things. But then, a lot of things were different pre-Lu Han.  
  
Xxx  
  
Ten months after Lu Gate, as Minseok has taken to calling it, there’s a knock on Yixing’s door. Yixing has been back from work for a while, lazing on the couch reading Lu Han’s book and the noise startles him. He’s not used to visitors.  
  
Warily he gets up and moves to the door. It’s always possible someone else from the slums has decided the time is ripe to pluck him from his relatively privileged position.   
  
“Who is it?” He calls through the door.  
  
“Lu Han.” The voice on the other side says.   
  
It’s muffled by the wall and for a minute Yixing can’t believe what he’s hearing. Lu Han didn’t want him. He had offered for Lu Han to come with him and he had said no, hadn’t he? It’s not fair of him to turn up on his doorstep now, not after all this time.  
  
“I know you probably don’t want to see me,” The voice continues. “But I’m asking you for a chance to explain myself. Please.”  
  
It’s the please that gets him. It’s the same please he heard when Lu Han had begged him to let Lu Han stay. It’s the same please he heard when Lu Han had pleaded with him to help him find Sehun. It’s the same please that gets him every goddamn time and it works this time as well.   
  
He opens the door.  
  
Lu Han stands before him. It feels like forever. He’s almost forgotten what Lu Han’s face looked like. Oh, he’d remembered the general impression -  _and Lu Han is still as handsome and pixie-like as ever_  - but he’d not remembered the slight scar on his lip, or the way the wrinkles scrunch up at the sides of his eyes when he smiles like he’s doing now.  
  
Lu Han notices how Yixing’s eyes drift over his face and blushes.   
  
“I’m sorry for smiling.” He say sheepishly. “It’s just… It’s good to see you.”  
  
“It’s good to see you too.” Yixing replies without thinking. “You look well.”  
  
He does. He looks older somehow, more adult, but somehow freer too. His hair is a rich auburn colour and falls loosely in two sides around his face. It suits him. It suits him much more than the blond ever did.   
  
Lu Han smiles again and lets Yixing usher him inside.   
  
“Do you want any tea?” Yixing asks. It feels a bit surreal to be asking that – to have Lu Han back in his flat at all actually, but a strange sense of politeness makes him ask.  
  
“No thank you.” Lu Han says, equally polite. “I just came for a chat.”  
  
“Alright then.” Yixing leads them both to the sofa. They take opposite ends and look at each other. Yixing wishes he had made some tea so he could have something to hide behind, but it’s too late for that now.  
  
“I guess you’d like to know why I left.” Lu Han starts. “And why I lied.”  
  
“That’d be a good start.” Yixing replies, more calmly than he feels.  
  
“I left because I couldn’t stand lying to you anymore.” Lu Han says bluntly. “It may sound cliché, but I love you and the thought of being with you when you didn’t know me – not the whole me – really hurt. I know that if I hadn’t lied in the first place it wouldn’t have been like that, but I was a coward. I was afraid to tell the truth so I ran instead.”  
  
Yixing sits stunned. It’s too much to take in. They’d never talked about feelings before. They’d only really shared that one night together and now to sit here and hear that Lu Han loved – no, loves – him is a lot to take in.   
  
“I understand.” He says at last. “It took me a long time, but I thought your reasons were something like that. And I understand. I wasn’t exactly friendly towards… people from your economic background.”   
  
The last bit makes Lu Han smile. “I wouldn’t be either, if I were in your position, so I understand too.”   
  
They lapse into silence for a while. Yixing is having trouble controlling his racing thoughts and Lu Han looks equally as overwhelmed by seeing Yixing again.  
  
“Why did you come back?” Yixing asks softly, breaking the silence. “It’s been ten months.”  
  
Lu Han runs a hand through his hair, frustrated. “Honestly, I never meant for it to be so long. I wanted to come and see you every day since the moment I left, but I had things I needed to sort out. I wanted to prove to you that…” He trails off. “Well, I’ll tell you my proposal first.”  
  
“Proposal?” Yixing blinks, confused.  
  
Lu Han shifts uncomfortably on the sofa. He turns to look at Yixing and his face is so open and expressive that Yixing almost feels himself falling in love all over again.  
  
“For the last nine months I’ve been working on taking over my father’s business. Originally I wanted to take over and restructure it, but the corruption is so endemic that I’ve been forced to shut it down, to liquidate it and start afresh. I want to make a company that can be proud to stand in the world today and say that it is free of corruption, that it is not just a money making machine but a way of reinvesting in the community.”  
  
It sounds all very lovely, but Yixing can hear the ‘but’ before Lu Han has even said it. “But?” He prompts.  
  
“But I don’t know what the community need, Yixing. I’m so out of touch with the world. I went to uni, but that’s not the real world. The most of it I’ve seen is here, while I was living with you, and even then I know you went out of your way to shield me from the worst of it.” Lu Han says honestly. “That’s why I need you.”  
  
“As some kind of charity case?” Yixing is furious. “A kind of, ‘let’s take on the poor boy’ deal? You feel you owe me something?”  
  
“No!” Lu Han denies vigorously. “Never! I genuinely don’t know what the slums needs or wants. I wouldn’t know where to begin. Even more than that, I think the slums has had enough of rich people telling them what they need and want, don’t you think?”  
  
Yixing does think that. He’s always thought that, and here Lu Han is, offering him exactly what he’s always wanted on a silver platter.  
  
“So I would be a, what? Representative of the slums?”  
  
“Something like that, yes.” Lu Han smiles. “From the people, for the people.”   
  
“And I would work for you?”  
  
“With me.” Lu Han says firmly. “You’d be my head of PR.” Upon seeing Yixing’s confusion he clarifies, “Personal relations. How the company interacts with the people it employs and the outside community.”  
  
“This is wrong. You shouldn’t give me the job just because you know me.”  
  
At this Lu Han smiles softly. “And that is why I know without interviewing anyone else that there is no one better suited for this job than you, Yixing.”  
  
Yixing blushes scarlet. He doesn’t know what to say to that. Nobody has ever spoken to him the way Lu Han does. He’s still thinking of the words to say when Lu Han picks himself up off the couch and starts heading to the door.  
  
“You don’t need to make the decision now.” He says. “The offer is always open to you. Think about it, talk to Minseok about it, whatever you need to do. Just let me know what you decide.”  
  
“Wait!” Yixing calls desperately.  
  
Lu Han stops immediately, half way out the door. It’s then Yixing doesn’t know what he wants to say.  
  
“Are the kids well? Sehun and Jongin?” He invents clumsily.  
  
The smile on Lu Han’s face when he mentions them is enough to blind him. “They are. They started school last month and causing mayhem as they do.”  
  
“I’m glad.” Yixing says. Lu Han turns to leave. “And your mother?”   
  
“Very well too.”  
  
“Good, good.”  
  
They stand there looking at each other, Yixing turned comically over the back of the sofa, Lu Han with one foot out the door.  
  
“Well, then.” Lu Han says at last. “I’ll be going then. See you around, Yixing.”  
  
“Lu Han, wait!” Yixing calls desperately.   
  
Lu Han waits. Yixing’s words catch in his throat. There’s so many things he wants to say, so many words he feels like he’s never used that now want to come spilling out his mouth except none of them will come. He stands there floundering. What can he say to sum up all of this?  _I love you? Don’t go?_  None of them feel like enough.   
  
 _Fuck it_  Yixing thinks.  _I’ve never been a man of many words anyway._    
  
 _He simply says **yes.**_


End file.
